Question about men and high risk hpv

[wtf]

So this question may have already been addressed, but I thought I would see what people think. I found out recently that my ex-gf had an abnormal pap smear and apparently has high risk HPV. I had been with other people before, but she had not, so its clear she got it from me. I feel like this puts me in the somewhat unusual situation of being a late 20s male who has confirmation of high risk HPV (I've never had any other signs of warts, etc, and I've always tested clear for everything else).
Given the timing of my other relationships, I would have picked it up at least 2.5 years ago, probably 3+. I feel like I'm now in a no-win situation. I have no way of knowing if I still have it, though from what I've read on timing I've probably cleared it at this point. Plus, lots of other guys out there probably also have it...but unless they date virgins who happen to have an abnormal pap later (and tell them about it), they have no way of knowing.
I haven't dated anyone since finding out (been out of the country), but will be probably start again soon. Do I have to disclose? If I knew I had it, then I certainly would, but for something I may not even have, I feel like disclosing it may prevent relationships for no reason (especially if 50%+ of other guys have it but have no way of knowing). Thoughts???

[The_Zen_Master]

Tough call. Definitely wear a condom. If a relationship gets serious and you both want to have unprotected sex then I would disclose that a girl from your past got HPV from you. Now a question of my own: You are a late 20's male who just took a girls virginity? How old was she? I can only assume she is in highschool, or just out of highschool. Don't you feel bad about being an older man, taking a girls virginity, and giving her HPV? What if she gets cervical cancer, will you feel bad then? All you fucking care about is how this affects your life and your future relationships? I realize that I do not know you or the circumstances, but it's sounds like you are a douchebag. When the risk is cervical cancer and genital warts, disclosing is always the right thing to do. So is not sleeping with teenage girls when you are approaching 30. Try not to defile any other virgins. If I were that girl's father I would beat the shit out of you for sure.

[The_Zen_Master]

Then again... I just read something on this site about a girl who waited until she was 21 and another who was 24 to lose their virginity. I had no idea that any women actually waited these days. That would be a totally different story. And 18 is 18 after all. You probably didn't deserve that little rant of mine. Fuck it though, I'm not going to delete it or anything. I'm just going to apologize for flying off the handle. I have a 4 year old daughter and it didn't work out with the mom. Things like that can turn you into a monster.

[stayposi]

Yeah, some girls still wait. I have a close friend that just lost her virginity, and she is 25. I know someone else who is 29! But the age of the person doesn't matter. When someone agrees to have sex, they have to deal with those consequences. I got HPV from the guy I lost my virginity to... and I have to deal with that. Even if a part of me does hate him, I know that it's also partly my fault. But better I got it from a serious relationship that some one night stand. I think getting HPV saved me from turning into a slut, really. I just turned 21, my friends were encouraging me to be flirty, and I hadn't had sex in so long I was beginning to think, "You know what, why not? I deserve pleasure just like anyone else!" But then the HPV turned up, and all those thoughts were gone.

Anyway, I think you should disclose. The thing about high-risk HPV is as long as girls get their yearly check ups, chances of dying from cervical cancer are very slim. If you are older, I bet a lot of the girls you would want to date have either already had HPV, or known girls who have. Just be up front, and let them examine the risks. Tell them they need to get their yearly paps. If some girl doesn't want to date you over it, she's probably shallow and you're better off. HPV is like any STI you can get rid of. I would like to enter a relationship and find out if the guy had ever had syphilis or chlamydia, even if he is clear now. That's just something that should be shared, in my opinion. And HPV is the same. Even after I am cleared, I am probably going to tell guys "I had HPV and genital warts when I was in my early 20s." And sure, I may have to deal with telling guys for the next few years, but I am hoping to get married eventually, so it's not like I'll have to be telling guys till I am 50 (hopefully I'll get married before that hahahah). Keep your chin up, you'll find someone who will want you for YOU, no matter what

[SanDiego000]

Reading many of these posts is confusing.
1. You have HPV for life
2. It clears from your system
3. You can always pass it on even if you have no symptoms.
What is the answer? If it clears then you should not be contagious, right.
But other post and MDs say you can still pass it on.

Help?

[The_Zen_Master]

Everyone is different. We are talking about a virus and immune functioning. Some suppress it, others can clear it. There can be outbreaks. There can be cures. There are no guarantees, and no one can say anything for certain. There are no certainties. Get used to not knowing, but understand that there is hope. It's a virus and you have an immune system.

[quest19]

WTF if you haven't had any warts, you can't be too sure that you have HPV. Doctors usually tell you about having GW by examining a wart that is present. I don't know this girl too well but do you think there's a chance she might had gotten it some where else? I mean you said you had no other signs of GW. I thin their are some test you could take to find out. That just might take a big load off you, finding out the truth whether you have it or not.

[wtf]

Just came back and read this. The girl was 24 at the time, FYI. I talked to the doctor at my university health center, where they see a lot of HPV apparently, and his opinion was that it was transient and that I probably didn't have it anymore. He was very circumspect about telling me whether or not to disclose...I gave the argument I made here and he just sort of nodded, without disagreeing or agreeing. He did say if I was going to have sex without a condom, it would probably be wise to mention it, but otherwise he didn't seem to think it was necessary. Just thought I'd share.